Saturday, April 15, 2006
One last Sariah post...
**Okay, I lied. I am gonna post one more thing... Another Sariah post. She's been insistent throughout, and I cannot easily turn away. But, I can attempt to tame my Bitch...**
This piece follows after my post Catty Continuation: Sariah's true mate, directly after the lionen Were/Sariah love scene...
The moment of bliss was brief.
He collapsed beside her, the graceful feline form flowing from him. He was the same man; same body, same ruddy brown hair and cocoa eyes. His face was as beautiful as the night of Xander's attack. Yet now it was haunted, melancholy; guilty even. He reached out to touch her cheek but stopped, the warmth of his flesh whispering against her skin. A tear slipped down his own. His bottom lip trembled.
"Sariah," he whispered. He tried to speak more, but a sob caught in his throat. Then, he did the unthinkable. He pulled away from her. He sat in an awkward cross-legged position, covering the part of him with which he had touched inside her.
"Stuart, what are you doing?"
"I… I'm sorry, Sariah. It's not what I am doing, but what I should not have done. I should not have come back. I should have never allowed you to love me... again… never allowed you to cloud my heart."
Sick shock settled into Sariah. His words hurt worse than any physical injury; they cut deep, tearing at her broken heart. She was struck silent, unable to retort, unable to speak. She rose up onto her knees, beseeching him with her posture. She reached for him, and he inched back, allowing only the barest tip of her finger to touch his skin. Tears bled from her eyes. Her heart convulsed in pain unknown. She was losing him. "Stuart?" she murmured. "I don't understand how you can do this to me. Why did you even touch me, touch my heart again? Please… come here."
"I cannot." Dark loss rang in his voice. "I don't know… I couldn't help myself, Sariah, but I do not want to love you again – still. It hurts too much, Sariah."
"But, we are free to be together now. Xander's gone, I saw to that."
Stuart actually flinched. "I know – I watched you exact your vengeance on him. Slaughter solves nothing, Sariah. I cannot come back to you knowing how many lives, how many men you've destroyed in your quest for vengeance. Knowing what you've become, I cannot give my love, my heart and soul, to you."
Anger trickled in to taint her shock.
Her teeth ached to sink into something, to gnash out her pain. Breath came and in went in hurried, hurtful gasps. Her hands balled up into hard, horrid fists. "You cannot give your love to me?" She sniffed. "You have been alive and had my heart all this time. I never wanted it back, nor do I now. Even if you don't want it, you can keep it. A heart is no good to me broken."
An uncontrolled sob stole its way from her throat. Sariah covered her trembling lips with a hand gone cold. She felt suddenly very naked and ashamed. If she could have taken those words back, she would have. But his words still cut into her. She crossed her arms over her bare breasts and turned from Stuart. She tilted her head down, her hair cascaded forward to curtain her emotional breakdown. Hot tears of heartache streamed down her cheeks.
She did not hear him leave over her own keening. Her only true love crashed back into her life, filled the emptiness in her soul; and as suddenly, with a few words he ripped that away. Her heart, which she had shored up with righteous rage, was dying away within her. She knew nothing but ache, breathed nothing but loss.
Sariah tipped her head back and loosed a howl if ringing pain...
**Now that I've poured that pain out, I am going to turn my mind to Fantasy... Ciao.**